token spirit animal

so my position in the office is that i'm the token spirit animal, and i know it sounds a bit off-the-wall, i mean, what the heck are they doing with hiring quotas again yada yada yknow how people like that are, but anyway - my job's to sit in a corner and read the endless stream of psionic energies emanating from each worker and identify points of friction for HR and team management. i'm surte you've heard about our job, it was a big thing back in 41 i think. people were "boycotting" pepsi-coca over it haha. but yeah like, i just sit around and stream through the echoes of the zeitgeist, sometimes i scream but that's normal. man haha do u remember when that was all over the news?? ofc its fairly normal now but a lot of ppl didnt realise that the token spirit animals just scream sometimes to manage mental load